I abhor going to the doctor's office.

I abhor going to the doctor's office for one over-arching reason that I think propels all of the unpleasantness about my visits there:

Clinic personnel fails to realize that normal citizens didn't go to med school, and also don't go to the clinic every day.

Just getting signed was rocky, and getting all my vitals checked was even worse, but I won't go on about those details. 

When I got to the exam room, the nurse immediately began asking me the same questions I've answered over and over and over again for the past two weeks. I'm pretty sure the entire medical world should know by now that I'm five foot seven, have a problem with my elbow, and am allergic to medical tape. He then verified what I came to have done, "so you're here for a pre-surgery physical..." I added the ellipses for a reason. Everything he says he says with so little end-of-sentence inflection that he never sounds done. I keep waiting for him to finish his sentence and by the time I realize he's done he's already been impatiently staring at me for an answer for a few seconds. I never know if he's asking a question, making a statement, giving instructions or just mumbling to himself. But I answered affirmatively.
"For what?"  
Please stop asking me ambiguous questions.
"For my elbow."
"What kind of surgery?"
"A biopsy."
"What kind of biopsy?"
.....? The kind on my elbow? I don't know.

Then my doctor came in. I really like her. She's very nice and very helpful. But she, too, can get caught up in the thought that normal people have any idea what she's talking about. She told me I needed to get my hemoglobin checked before surgery and then we'd be done. "Okay. Sounds good." I said. She left the room. I googled "hemoglobin."

Mr. Mean Nurse came to the door. Now in my experience, doctors/ nurses knock and them immediately walk through the door. I've always actually wondered why they knock. This particular time I heard a knock, but no one entered. I went back to reading only to be disturbed by another knock. This time I said "come in" but no one entered. I figured it must be the door next to me. Then there was another knock and he said "can  I come in?" I responded affirmatively but he still didn't enter, and then knocked again. I finally just let him in.

He came to take me to the lab, because apparently hemoglobin is blood. He sat me down in a waiting room, that was really more like a hallway. And then walked away. I just went ahead and kept reading my book, wondering what the crap I was doing and still not totally sure what hemoglobin was. Then I head a voice say my name: "Joanna!" I didn't know where it was coming from. I perked my head up and sheepishly said "yes?" Nothing. No one answered. To give you an idea of my confusion, this is a diagram of my location.Where is that voice coming from? 


Someone finally emerged from that tiny room on the top to tell me to sit down in a different chair. Without saying much of anything, she drew my blood and then put medical tape on it. I don't know how many times I have to tell these people that I'm allergic to medical tape, but it seems I haven't done it enough quite yet. After she was done she told me to go back to "the room." I asked her to clarify which room I should return to, but she only pointed in the direction of both the waiting room and the way I entered the waiting room. So I just sat down in the waiting room and resumed reading. Then the mean nurse came. "Are you done?" "Yep." "Okay we can go back to the room now." Which room? He led me to a hallway with six doors on either side and said "You can go in." Which room? I eventually figured out which room was the one I was in before, but it still is amazing to me that no one could think of any way to indicate which of the twelve numbered rooms I should go to.

There were many other details which were extremely frustrating at the time, but would only bore someone to read about them. The main takeaway from this is that I absolutely hate trips to the doctor's office.

Watch this.

Paul's Tormentor Uncovered

O, that God might teach me to think with such an eternal perspective!

Christopher Love was a Puritan pastor that faithfully and beautifully taught the word of God. He was perceived a threat to the government and therefore beheaded. These some of the last exchanged words between him and his wife.

July 14, 1651
     Before I write a word further, I beseech thee think not that it is thy wife but a friend now that writes to thee. I hope thou hast freely given up thy wife and children to God, who had said in Jeremiah 49:11, "Leave thy fatherless children, I will preserve them alive, and let thy widow trust in me." Thy Maker will be my husband, and a Father to thy children. O that the Lord would keep thee from having one troubled thought for thy relations. I desire freely to give thee up into thy Father's hands, and not only look upon it as a crown of glory for thee to die for Christ, but as an honor to me that I should have a husband to leave for Christ.
     I dare not speak to thee, nor have a thought within my own heart of my unspeakable loss, but wholly keep my eye fixed upon thy inexpressible and inconceivable gain. Thou leavest but a sinful, mortal wife to be everlastingly married to the Lord of glory. Thou leavest but children, brothers, and sisters to go to the Lord Jesus, thy eldest Brother. Thou leavest friends on earth to go to the enjoyment of saints and angels, and the spirits of just men made perfect in glory. Thou dost but leave earth for heaven and changest a prison for a palace. And if natural affections should begin to arise, I hope that spirit of grace that is within thee will quiet them, knowing that all things here below are but dung and dross in comparison to those things that are above. I know thou keepest thine eye fixed on the hope of glory, which makes thy feet trample on the loss of earth.
     My dear, I know God hath not only prepared glory for thee, and thee for it, but I am persuaded that He will sweeten the way for thee to come to the enjoyment of it. When thou art putting on they clothes that morning, O think, "I am now putting on my wedding garments to go to be everlastingly married to my Redeemer."
     When the messenger of death comes to thee, let him not seem dreadful to thee, but look on him as a messenger that brings thee tidings of eternal life. When thou goest up the scaffold, think (as thou saidst to me) that it is but thy fiery chariot to carry thee up to thy Father's house.
     And when thou layest down thy precious head to receive thy Father's stroke, remember that thou saidst to me: Though thy head was severed from the body, yet in a moment thy soul should be united to thy Head, the Lord Jesus, in heaven.  And though it may seem something bitter, that by the hands of men we are parted a little sooner than otherwise we might have been, yet let us consider that it is the decree and will of our Father, and it will not be long ere we shall enjoy one another in heaven again.
     Let us comfort one another with these sayings. Be comforted, my dear heart. It is but a little stroke and thou shalt be there where the weary shall be at rest and where the wicked shall cease from troubling. Remember that thou mayest eat thy dinner with bitter herbs, yet thou shalt have a sweet supper with Christ that night. My dear, by what I write unto thee, I do not hereby undertake to teach thee; for these comforts I have received from the Lord by thee. I will write no more, nor trouble thee any further, but commit thee into the arms of God with whom ere long thee and I shall be.
     Farewell, my dear. I shall never see thy face more till we both behold the face of the Lord Jesus at that great day.

Mary Love

 

From the Tower of London
August 22, 1651
The Day of My Glorification My most gracious beloved,
    I am now going from a prison to a palace. I have finished my work, I am now to receive my wages. I am now going to heaven where are two of my children, and leaving thee on the earth where are three of my babes. Those two above need not my care, but the three below need thine. It comforts me to think two of my children are in the bosom of Abraham and three of them will be in the arms and care of so tender a godly mother.
     I know thou art a woman of a sorrowful spirit, yet be comforted; though thy sorrow be great for thy husband's going out of the world, yet the pains shall be the less in bringing thy child into the world. Thou shalt be a joyful mother, though thou beest a sad widow. God hath many mercies in store for thee; the prayers of a dying husband for thee will not be lost. To my shame I speak it: I never prayed so much for thee at liberty as I have done in prison. I cannot write more, but I have a few practical counsels to leave with thee:
     1. Keep under a sound, orthodox and soul-searching ministry. Oh, there are deceivers gone out into the world, but Christ's sheep know His voice and a stranger they will not follow. Attend on that ministry that teaches the way of God in truth, and follow Solomon's advice, Proverbs 19:27, "Cease to hear instruction that causes to err from the ways of knowledge."
     2. Bring up thy children in the knowledge and admonition of the Lord. The mother ought to be a teacher in the father's absence. Proverbs 31:1, "The words which his mother taught him;" and Timothy was instructed by his grandmother Lois and his mother Eunice, 2 Timothy 1:5.
     3. Pray in thy family daily, that thy dwelling may be in the number of the families that call upon God.
     4. Labor for a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price, 1 Peter 3:4.
     5. Pour not on the comforts thou wantest, but on the mercies thou hast.
     6. Look rather at God's end in afflicting than at the measure and degree of thy affliction.
     7. Labor to clear up thy evidences for heaven when God takes from thee the comforts of earth, that as thy sufferings do abound, so thy consolations in Christ may abound much more, 2 Corinthians 1:5.
     8. Though it is good to maintain a holy jealousy of the deceitfulness of thy heart, yet it is evil for thee to cherish fears and doubts about the truth of thy graces. If ever I had confidence touching the grace of another, I have confidence of grace in thee. I can say of thee as Peter did of Silvanus, "I am persuaded that this is the grace of God wherein thou standest." 1 Peter 5:12. Oh, my dear soul, wherefore doest thou doubt, whose heart hath been upright, whose walkings have been holy. I could venture my soul in thy soul's stead, such a confidence I have of thee.
     9. When thou findest thy heart secure, presumptuous and proud, then pour upon corruption more than upon grace; but when thou findest thy heart doubting and unbelieving, then look on the grace not on thy infirmities.
     10. Study the covenant of grace and the merits of Christ, and then be troubled if thou canst. Thou art interested in such a covenant that accepts purposes for performances, desires for deeds, sincerity for perfection, the righteousness of another, that of Jesus Christ, as if it were thine own. Oh, my love! Rest, rest, then, in the love of God, in the bosom of Christ.
     11. Swallow up thy will in the will of God. It is a bitter cup we are to drink, but it is the cup our Father hath put into our hands. When Paul as to go to suffer at Jerusalem, the Christians could say, "The will of the Lord be done." Oh, say thou, when I go to Tower Hill, "The will of the Lord be done."
     12. Rejoice in my joy. To mourn for me inordinately argues that either thou enviest or suspectest my happiness. The joy of the Lord is my strength; oh, let is be thine also!
     Dear wife, farewell. I will call thee wife no more. I shall see thy face no more, yet I am not much troubled for now I am going to meet the Bridegroom, the Lord Jesus Christ, to whom I shall be eternally married.

Thy dying yet most affectionate friend till death,
Christopher Love